For an achievement-minded person such as myself, adjusting a goal to a lower setting or eliminating it altogether often feels like failure. That contributes to my dilemma each year when it comes time to set resolutions or intentions as I described a couple months ago. Last month, I described the struggles I had meeting a few of the goals, as well as some of the successes. February and the beginning of March brought a few more challenges and prompted reevaluation of some, not all, of the goals, primarily the fitness-related goals.
As I begin this reflection and reevaluation, I find it helpful to pinpoint what I hope to accomplish with these goals. I often ask my students, after they do something foolish, what they hope to get from acting that way. Most often they shrug and say “I don’t know.” I think I may be guilty of doing the same. In the area of fitness, I long to be physically active as much as possible, especially with running and to a lesser extent cycling. I find satisfaction in knocking out a long run, feeling fit, and finishing races. While I also love making goals and accomplishing them, I find more, longer lasting pleasure from the experience. When it comes to work related goals, I want to reach a place where I can balance doing the best job as a teacher that I can without becoming consumed with work, and, at my current job, all the negativity that comes along with it.
Keeping these desired outcomes in mind, here is how I intend to adjust my 2019 goals. INstead of exact number goals for running and cycling, I adjust those goals to one of effort. In 2019, I want to get in some sort of workout six days every week, primarily in the form of a run. Although the exact form may vary. I still want to accomplish the following: long runs or races every weekend of at least two hours, weekly strength training, and weekday runs of at least 45 minutes. I think I jumped back too quickly into the numerical goal rather than rebuilding the habit.
In reality, those two fitness goals are the only ones that I think need actual adjustment. In the case of some of the other goals, I need to explore what I can do or research to help myself accomplish the goals. It’s not a sink or swim situation. I think specifically of my goal to get out of bed right away in the morning. I still want to re-establish this habit yet my actions have yet to live up to my words.
Since beginning this reflection, I have begun investigating what will actually help me reach that goal. I keep coming back to two things: simplify and reliance on God. I have talked before about my desire to do all the things yet stumbling before even starting on most tasks. I may dig into that later but for now, I will stop with the idea of simplification. By simplifying, I will not just take out goals or tasks for the sake of minimizing. Instead, I want to simplify after figuring out what I really want and eliminating the things that will not help me get there. More importantly, I realized that for the most part, i have tried to make all these changes on my own. That realization hit me like a ton of bricks. Of course, I cannot change these habits. I have no power. Only God can do these things. I had not even thought to ask Him.
As I move forward in the year, I want to move forward by asking God to help me make these changes, accomplish these goals, and simplify my desires. I want to want what He wants. This mindset will help bring me even closer to Him, my ultimate desire.