I started this year knowing that something needs to change if I want to achieve real change and growth. Recently, I identified one of the biggest stumbling blocks in my path, something I always knew I had a propensity for, procrastination, procrastination brought on and aided by distraction.
I started weeks looking ahead and seeing all that I needed to do amidst all the other school obligations, both during and after contract hours. Each week I vowed that I would do a better job at safeguarding my time during planning and after school. That meant that I would look to immediately take care of items on my to do list rather than fall down the rabbit hole of reading a bunch of interesting articles on CNN or wandering over to the populated section of the seventh grade hall and getting caught in a conversation. Each day of those weeks I found myself doing exactly what I told myself not to do. What’s more, each time this happened I knew I had given in but I made no changes; I didn’t stop.
Time after time I heeded the siren call of mindless internet scrolling and innocuous conversations. Why? Why would I do this when I knew the result, the added evening work I gave to myself? I had a feeling that the answer to that one would be the same as to why at home I would continually flip to another browser tab, usually Facebook, while working on lesson plans or the like, extending the time I still had to work.
The answer started to come to me as I reflected on some interactions I had with some of my classes. Like a lightning strike, something I knew but didn’t connect to anything else, became startlingly clear. I already knew that I needed a cup of coffee to sleep well at night, to calm my racing mind. Caffeine has a calming effect on those with ADD/ADHD. I realized that the little annoying things my students would do repetitively, the things that didn’t actually interfere, generated intense distraction in my own mind. I, then, failed to handle those distractions well. The last piece that came, came from an article a Facebook friend posted about ADD. Each of the things mentioned resonated resoundingly, especially one that talked about avoidance of difficult tasks. Bingo. Nail on the head. Light bulb moment. Insert cliché here.
The tricky part comes with the remedy. Not only is this procrastination a habit but I also seem to be physically inclined towards it. How do I go about changing something I appear hard wired for? I’ve taken the first step here by acknowledging the issue. The next steps will come slowly, in small increments. I have not figured them all out yet. One, I intend to find a way to block the websites I frequent the most so that while I work, a “physical” barrier prevents my fall down the worm holl of procrastination. Two, I deleted a game from my iPad that I have had since I bought my first iPad back in 2010, a game which if I was not careful would easily suck half an hour or more of mindless play from my day.
Beyond that, I do not know what I need to do. The next step? Figure out the next steps.
Check out the “How to ADHD” channel on Youtube. Also, there are *tons* of phenomenal resources out there for understanding and working with adult ADHD. If you have ADHD, neurotypical methods of motivation and habit building aren’t going to stick. Not only will they not work, but they’ll set you up for failure, and you’ll end up thinking it’s your fault. You have to build your own guidebook for a world that’s built for neurotypical people. There are things that can work well across the board for most ADHDers, but often, your systems will be unique and personalized to your specific likes, dislikes, and motivators.
Try, for at least a week, using a notepad or voice recorder or something and keeping track of times where you find yourself motivated or super focused or lost in something. Take note of what it was that piqued your interest and got you started on whatever you’re doing. Compile that info and see what patterns emerge and how you can use them to your advantage. For example, I know that once I *start* cleaning, I’m in the zone, and I’ll knock out a whole bunch of stuff, but it feels almost impossible to get over that initial hurdle. I discovered that if I knew I had guest coming over soon, I was SUPER motivated to clean (urgency tends to register to ADHD brains a lot more than the actual importance of a task – there’s a great video on it on that youtube channel I mentioned), so one thing I try to do is plan for one night every week (give or take) to have guests come over. It helps me have a reason to start the thing I need to do, and the more consistent it is, the easier it becomes to start that cleaning earlier than like, a half hour before it needs to happen.
That’s just one small tactic for starting to think about one small aspect of this stuff, but I find it’s nice to have something concrete to do to feel not completely lost.
Focus on understanding how your brain actually works. Instead of looking at this as a bad habit you’re hardwired for, understand that it’s just one aspect of how your brain works, and it can have negative *and* positive effects. You’ve just got to learn how to harness the secret superpower. 🙂
In addition to all the resources available on adult ADHD (www.additudemag.com is a good jumping off point too), I strongly suggest talking to your doctor and/or psychiatrist. ADD/ADHD is extremely under-diagnosed in women, especially ones who do well academically, and it also shares a lot of overlap with some other things like sensory processing disorders, autism spectrum disorders, OCD, etc.. A qualified health professional is *crucial* in making sure you get the most effective help and solutions possible. I really can’t stress this enough. There are times when I think I’ve totally got a handle on things, and I’ve done research and thought through things, and feel like I know what I’m talking about, and then I discover that, for example, I have spent my whole life not actually having the same definition of anxiety that the rest of the world does. -_- Another example would be that time I found out I have ADHD that went undiagnosed for 27 years, and I’m actually not a complete failure! :p No matter how well I think I can work through things and help myself, I am continually reminded that I really do need the expertise and understanding that these qualified medical professionals have. Also, not everyone likes medication, but it, for me, has changed the game. It has helped me be able to actually function at the level that I always felt like I was capable of but could never quite achieve. And it enables me to develop systems to have in place for when I’m not taking medication too.
Long story short, there are tons of resources, don’t try to fit into a round hole if you’re a starfish (use a starfish-shaped hole), talk to your doctor, talk to your doctor, talk to your doctor, and think about how to harness your superpower rather than how to squash bad habits and “failure.”
This is fantastic information!
Thank you so much. You always have such wise words.